R U OK? – Put your hand up if you are not!
For the last few days, after deciding that I want to join bloggers around the country who are opening up and sharing, or offering inspiration for those that are NOT OK, in support of R U OK DAY, I have felt uncomfortable, very tense in my neck and shoulders as I tried to decide what to add to this collection of heart-felt sharing.
I have wonderful friends and family who are always asking me if I am OK, and most of the time even if I am feeling so far from OK that I have forgotten what it feels like, I put on my smiling face and tell them all is well. I am too proud to admit that sometimes I am having one hell of day and just want to go and curl up in a ball and cry. Fortunately not all days are like that, other days I get in that wonderful happy place and cruise along beautifully. I am still working on how to even things out and find a happy medium.
Early last year my world as I new it came crashing down, everyone around me was so surprised that the ‘perfect’ 23 year marriage I was in was over. No one believed it, no one knew that there was anything wrong, because I did not tell, ever!
Life with an alcoholic is hard, I didn’t realise how hard, so much just evolved over time. I did not notice how much I had changed, I did not realise that I denied my voice from speaking up to keep the peace, I did not realise that my daughters hated weekends that their father was at home and not working, I lost count of all the excuses I used to justify behaviour. He is a good man with a bad disease that he will take no action to fix.
I have done things I am not proud of, in the name of self-preservation.
The fear, anger, frustration, and tears have flooded me, as I start again with nothing, no security, no savings, nothing but me and my two gorgous girls, and together we will succeed and thrive no matter what is thrown at us!!!!
As tempting as it was to run to the doctor, and get hooked up on a cocktail of anti-depressents, to make me feel good, I knew as a Natural Therapist, that I had to heal, allow myself to heal, allow myself to grieve and allow myself to release the energy blocks that have built up over years.
The repair has begun, and will be ongoing for quite some time, and one of the most beneficial things I have done is use EFT or tapping as it is most commonly known. EFT helps you to calm your reactions to events and feelings and even though my list of things to tap on seems to grow, I am so thankful that I found this way to help me on my path to wellness.
As there are so many people, who just don’t know what to do when life is tough, I have put this script together that you can start on right now, all you need is your fingers. It does not matter whether you believe it works or not, just do it!
Thank you www.thrivingnow.com for providing this image to share, and if you have never used EFT before, they have a wonderful free guide you can download on their site.
Tapping is simply applied to the body, using your finger tips. Gently tapping on the points shown above as you say the words out loud in the script provided below. Use your dominant hand. Use your pointer and middle finger on all the points except the top of your head, where you can use all four.
I AM OK
Get comfortable and find a quiet place where you can speak outload comfortably. Start by taking a three big deep breaths in and slowly release the air.
On the final breath in, say out loud – “I AM OK”
On a scale from 1 – 10, rate how you feel. 1 being calm and comfortable with I AM OK, and 10 feeling very uncomfortable, possibly in pain with I AM OK. Don’t judge how you feel, don’t try and dull the experience, just acknowledge what number you think you are on the scale.
Take another deep breath and start tapping…..
KARATE CHOP POINT
“Even though I am feeling really bad, AND I am not OK, I deeply and completely accept how I feel”
“Even though I am feeling really sad, AND I don’t know what to do, I deeply and completely accept how I feel”
“I am depressed”
“I am NOT OK”
“I am angry”
“I am so sad”
“No one understands how I feel”
“I don’t know how to fix this”
“I don’t know if I can fix this”
“There just does not seem to be anything I can do”
“I deeply and completely accept how I feel anyway”
Take another deep breath and then start tapping though the points as shown above…..
EYEBROW – “I am down and not OK”
SIDE OF EYE – “I am stressed”
UNDER EYE – “I don’t know what to do”
UNDER NOSE – “I don’t know who to talk to”
CHIN – “I can’t get better”
COLLAR BONE – “I am over this”
UNDER ARM – “It’s everyone else’s fault”
TOP OF HEAD – “I am really down, but I choose to love and accept how I feel”
Take a deep breath and go on to the next round….
EB – “Even though I am feeling bad, and I don’t know what to do”
SE – “There must be something I can do”
UE – “Even though I have felt so down for so long”
UN – “It would be nice if I could find a way”
CH – “I don’t know how to make myself feel good today”
CB – “But there must be a way and I would love to find it”
UA – “I accept I need help and deserve to find a way to feel better”
TH – “I deeply and completely accept everything I feel good or bad”
Take a deep breath and go on the the next round….
EB – “I deserve to feel good”
SE – “I am worthy of being happy, no matter what happended in the past”
UE – “I am open to finding ways to help myself feel better”
UN – “I am open to finding the right people to help me”
CH – “I am amazing”
CB – “I am turning my negative focus to a positive focus, because I deserve to be happy”
UN- “I am determined to succeed and release all the negative stuff in my life”
TH- “I know I can do this, I am worthy and I am deserving.
Now, take another deep breath, and rate how you feel between 1 and 10 again. Even the tiniest drop in your rating is a step in the right direction. Start all over again from the top and do it again and again, at least once a day for the next 21 days if you need too. Feel free to alter the script if you have a particular issue that you would like to release, this is your life, you are worth it, and the more you individualise it, the more powerful it will be for you.
It does not matter where you are today, tomorrow is a new day, so please don’t give up, keep on tapping, get help the – R U OK website is full of support, contacts and wonderful information and a great place to start, talk to anyone that will listen, you are an amazing and you can do this……:)
If you use this tapping script, please let me know how it worked for you, thank you and good luck!
You are amazing and you will be more than OK when you get through this. Thank you so much for sharing some of your story and for sharing these great tips.
Thanks Kama, don’t always feel amazing, but doing the VERY best I can 🙂